US Senator, Joe Biden billed obscure federal agencies for tens of thousands of dollars in security expenses amassed during the time when he was beginning an extramarital relationship with future wife Jill Tracy Jacobs in the Aspen, according to previously undisclosed government records.

The documents, obtained by Delawareliberal under Freedom of Information Laws, show that the travel costs had nothing to do with the functions of any Senate Committee that defrayed his tabs.

I was just wondering where the story would be right now if it was a Democrat? You know,…with our “liberal media” and all.

If you managed to read this far without freaking out please give yourself a hand.