I am pleased to announce that the War on Christmas has turned the corner. It turns out that we have a lot in common with Santa. He has been a constant source of irritation for those that would want less commercialism at Christmastime. We have found common ground with him and have forged a treaty with the “Northern Alliance.” We feel that with his global reach and advanced technology, Christmas should fall by the end of the month.
Santa has already agreed to change his signature “Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night” to a more pleasing “Happy Holidays to all and to all a good night.”
As part of the agreement, we will push for “Silver Bells” to replace “Away in the Manger” at all caroling events.
December 8, 2007 at 1:06 pm
I for one am distributing fake handicapped placards so those seeking more commercialism may park their fighting vehicles at the very door of the supply depots.
December 8, 2007 at 1:10 pm
Here is some festive War On Christmas music, with a rather excellent logo:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=t_KiHRHwaAs
December 8, 2007 at 4:48 pm
Reporting from the front.
December 9, 2007 at 4:22 pm
What has my attention during this most holy of seasons is the war between those saying ‘Happy Holidays’ and those demanding that ‘Merry Christmas’ is the only acceptible greeting during Saturnalia. I got an email paradoy on ‘Twas the Night Before…..’ that went from the ‘HH’ vs ‘MC’ to prayer in schools!!!!!! Who thinks up this crap?
FYI: It is, afterall, a pagan holiday….historical evidence points to the Christ child being born in July. The pagans liked to party and wouldn’t give up some aspects of the winter festival so the crafty christians incorporated them within the story they wanted to tell (or should I say ’sell’?).
My point (yes, I have a point) is that I believe ‘Happy Holidays’ more in keeping with a culti-cultural society.
December 9, 2007 at 4:24 pm
that would be ‘multi-cultural society’….
December 9, 2007 at 4:52 pm
HAHAHAHA but culti-cultural works sooooo well with the war on Christmas
December 10, 2007 at 12:31 am
ANNON II
The Pagans stole Christmas from us. Only our Santa was a chubby women with giants breasts.
December 24, 2007 at 7:38 am
[...] neocon madness, parental responsibility There has been some bantering about on some of the local blogs about a “war on Christmas” being undertaken by a large majority of unseen [...]